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Disorder 1: Over-Controlling Demon

A man being controlled like a puppet
Illustration by Miguel Gutierrez (Michel)

The lyrics written by Herr Potatis poetically and symbolically address the experience of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), a mental condition characterized by intrusive thoughts and obsessions, as well as the need to perform certain rituals or compulsions to alleviate anxiety. The song describes an internal struggle between light and darkness on the "battlefield" of the affected person's mind. The metaphor of sweeping blood under the carpet and hiding chaos under a blanket of order represents how someone with OCD tries to conceal their intrusive thoughts and compulsive rituals from others.

The lyrics also explore self-criticism and the feeling of being trapped in a self-imposed mental prison, where the person smiles but rejects the help of others. The mention of being "seduced by the deception of control" and "frozen by the damnation I chose" reflects the struggle for perfection and the fear of losing control over one's own thoughts and actions. The plea for help in fighting the "demon of excessive control" shows the desire for liberation and recovery.

The last part of the lyrics suggests a kind of internal ritual to seek relief from anxiety, symbolized by the act of counting to three. However, despite these attempts, the song emphasizes the feeling that things are never quite right. In summary, Herr Potatis' lyrics deal with the emotional and mental challenges of living with OCD, portraying the battle against obsessive thoughts and the quest for control in a constant internal struggle.


Welcome, my friend
To no man's land
A pristine battlefield where light and darkness face each
every day, every hour, every minute,
upon agreement of sweeping all blood under the carpet,
hide chaos underneath an order blanket.

I am trapped inside
the walls of a prison I have created (myself)
Giving a smile
reject the people who try to help me (out)

Haunted by doubts
That push me into a world of black or white
I'm starting to drown
Sinking in this mental quicksand

Trying to get perfection
Seduced by the swindle of control
Frozen by the damnation that I chose

Help me to fight
This over-controlling demon.
Don't let him drive my life.
I can't reach your hand
There's an abyss in the cracks in the pavement
and I am scared to jump.
I know my life is a mess
still, I'll rebuke you for every slightest mistake
sorry, I know it's not fair
I judge the others' behaviour 'cause I hate myself.

Count to three

(One, two, three)
and it's all right
Count to three
(One, two, three)
and it's all right
Count to three
(One, two, three)
but it's never right

Help me to fight
This over-controlling demon.
Don't let him drive my life.
You say that surety is a lie
I should stop using my mind (and) start using my eyes
Don't try to question my sight
But all I can see is the risk
of dying alone without someone beside me.

Just one more check